Me and my thoughts

This is not possessiveness I am happy for you You may not believe it But I am really happy for you We dont have much in common But somehow we sink Enough to pull me into the deepest waters You seem to understand me at times Which noone ever has managed You are not my friend We are not in a relationship Sometimes you are like writing to me You are sometimes so dependent on me That I actually feel that you are my baby Maybe I am guilty to extent And grateful to some level We fight like dogs And hate each other so much You are reminder of my incompetence Maybe we did not try enough Or maybe we were not destined to be together I might not be able to lead a life with you You are not X I am not even sure if X exists But I am little doubtful of life without you You are the sweet trouble of my life Maybe CO2 is as important as O2 It hurts when you lie to me 6 years was too less to be honest to each other I dont have a name to our relationship I know and cant imag

Hey moon how do you manage to stay alone Even when there are so many stars around you How do handle the pain of loniliness Do u hide behind the clouds Just to hide your sorrow Alone seems to be a five letter word It might be a small word For those who know just the word It just a feeling But for those who experience it It makes a world  of difference  

Music has never interested me Ok Stop Staring  I am not a jerk Music has never stopped my thinking Or served as a source of thinking Maybe I have never listened to her She always has been helpful to escape some lonely walks I am not sure how much actually entered my mind However she has prevented the entry of other things Recently I have been forced To listen to her Somehow, The words made a great impact Compared to the tune But I realised that she is actually growing on me I find myself immersed in her at times And Not to hate the sight of her I might not been a music fanatic But I do think I am on my way to be a Music lover Yes I have a long way to go But Its a Important start for me

What is wrong in being a Audience She is also a Human Who breathes, eat and sleeps just like a Human There is no much physical difference Just that she is a little indifferent though She is almost a Human without emotions But when did this journey start , Like all , she got into the world web Initially she used to talk to people reguraly She used to know the things around her She used to sensitive to the environment She used to treat others as humans She used to feel guilty for things not under her control After entanglement in the web She started connecting with a number of friends Her circle expanded, Her friend list grew She started updating her life in it She began following others life in it Slowly and Gradually She became insensitive She became indifferent She entered the Like, comment Share Sometimes her world is reduced to 140 letters She is an Audience Now She being the world

What do we do when we see a mishap happening Do we try to help them Do we try to call help Do we feel for them Or Do we like and share What is happening to us Why have we changed from being human to mere spectators Why has our world shrunk from that big to our hands Of course we read papers and watch news But what actually impacts us most Is what we see in social media If something bad happens to someone in the world We just share it virally and aimlessly in the social world Maybe the few soft and angry ones may put a comment And forget about it when the next time is shared Nothing actually impacts us Nor affects us News spreads fast which is good Groups discuss about it, Which is better And forget about it faster, which is the best part We have changed into just a mere audience Every happening is just like a movie In this viral era

As i wait for you to run over me I know the pain you would cause But i am too numb to cry I think about our days together I remember the shared smiles And also the secret tears I remember your promises And also our failures The pain is too much to bear And I have nothing left to give I just keep staring for a change But I just hear silence around me

Every time I hold on to teddy I think its you I imagine that you speak you I imagine that you will hold on to me I imagine that you will be with me always I imagine that you are a strength to me I imagine a whole lot things about us And I wake up to realise That you are a part of my imagination

Right time, Right Person, Right Time Do you really exist I really want to know the answer Even if you exist When will you come If you not present when i really need you What is the purpose of having you later on I am going through times Where i need a shoulder to cry A hand to hold The warmth to breathe And a force to drive me You dont seem to exist anywhere in my world Nor in any other form If you come after a point of time After I have learnt to live alone Or after I have overcome my problems Do I really need you at that time I dont want you to be a trophy for my victories I want you to be driving force of my life If you are not present at the time I need you Then are you the right person Or are you an additional responsiblity and an irritation

Something seems to have possessed me And it is definitely bothering me My life is not that bad It is not good either  I am blessed , which I would not disagree I have the strength as of now to handle life (Touchwood) But i feel so worn out and worthless And also bored It may be due to loneliness Or maybe due to frustration Or maybe I have reached my threshold limit Sometimes I feel vacuum around me And i feel so suffocated And depressed I really hate this part of me Life has atlast managed to flick my happiness from me And my peace of mind The person I see in the mirror does not have any oxygen left My laughter sounds hollows to my own ears My tears seem meaningless I am always looking out for something But I never managed to figure out what it is Or Where it is Every morning I wake in the hope of happiness But I am still searching an anchorage And seems impossible Due to the Possession

Do you really exist Or Are you are figment of my imagination You appear in the movies i watch And the books i read Sometimes you even appear in my dreams But in really Life , You are literally extinct I have not seen a lot of people possessed by you Or even by a small portion of you Your presence in my life is minimal Through my parents Maybe through my sister And few of my friends But over a point of time You disguise in the form of need People use you a bartering tool People give you only in exchange of something I have lot hope in you And you have ceased to exist I dont miss you that much But at times , I imagine a life with you Whether you bring happiness or patience You are a missing entity of my life Four Letter Weapon

Is it wrong to be me? Is it wrong to be different? Is it wrong to have wishes? Is it wrong if my wishes are unique? I am different Both genetically and emotionally I might hate what the whole world might love And my favorite thing might be something the world hates I maybe have the worst choices I maybe sometimes stupid And make some crazy choices Yes I get hurt And my choices back fire I learn from the mistakes And grow up Still it makes me proud That i am living my life Instead of following a herd Yes I am the odd one out I have my choices And I live my life as me Is it wrong to be me

How do you judge a person By the shape of the eyes By the length of the nose By the sweetness of the smile By the charming of the face By the appearance By the make up By the dress By the height By the weight By the way they look By their job By their religion By their family By their wealth By their health Or for the person they are Yes Appearance gives the first impression May some vibes also But is it right to judge a person By the above things  Or for the person they are  

Acceptance is a treat Just because you don’t know something Does not mean you are nothing Why do people have to make you feel worthless Sometimes even when its not your fault They love to blame They love to grumble They love to put you down Even when its not your fault Reason maybe to hide their insecurities Or make them feel better With or without their knowledge, They make others feel bad And easily make others feel down Why do they have to do it Why they don’t have the courage to accept their in-capabilities Just because they want to feel good Does not mean they have to do this to others If everyone wants the best Then what is the purpose of life Why cant they just accept things Acceptance is definitely a treat

As you pour down As if there is no tomorrow With Light and sound for company You bring everything to halt You make everyone stare at you You beat with so much force That I wonder who are you angry with You make us feel cold And at the same time warm also Which is quite fascinating You are always special to me You mesmerize me I lose myself in you U look new to me Even for the 1000th time You make me feel warm Even after you drench me You dissolve my tears And make me feel good You comfort me with your breeze And wash away my sorrows Just by looking at you And getting blessed by your showers You bring time to a stop I have missed hours just staring at you And getting lost In your pouring passion

Something which I have not conquered yet Have not even started trying And I will never be able to win it This question arises in every house For every girl and sometimes boys The moment they cross teens We technically live in schools and colleges Few of us dont have the urge to do it Even if we are interested We have a lot of hinderances In the form of Hot oil Jumping mustards Sizzling onions Extra hot pans Sharp knives Sharper tongues And many more But the time we manage these We loss the interest and the time And people start asking Do u know how to do it They ask you so many times That you ask yourself Is something wrong with me Or with the people around me You actually start hating it And I am not when i will ever start Cooking - The unconquerable friend

It happens almost always History almost repeats itself Life is full of surprises and shocks But this does not mean That the surprises has to be new It can happen again And still shock you Not only incidents happen again Memory losses too As in my life It might have happened 13 years ago It might not have happened I have no clue of what happened Not even a slightest memory They might be a reason behind it Because losses happen due to a reason It might have been pain The fear of loss The numbness of hurt Or maybe all these things After 13 years, these happen again And the history begins to repeat itself The surprising thing is the history is just the same And it is not shocking to me